A Photo Essay of Toys That Offended Me Today at the Toy Store

Seriously? They had to slut up Candy Land? It's fucking Candy Land. I want a Napoleon ice cream bar and a chubby gingerbread dude, not Bratz dolls. Ugh.

Seriously? They had to slut up Candy Land? It’s fucking Candy Land. I want a Napoleon ice cream bar and a chubby gingerbread dude, not Bratz dolls. Ugh.

Stephanie's beach house. Great. Legos are marketed to little boys as a way to aspire to be superheroes or firefighters. Little girls are taught to be aspirational towards things like second homes to laze around in with their gal pals. Ok, so that sounds awesome, but it's still sexist and disgusting.

Stephanie’s beach house. Great. Legos are marketed to little boys as a way to aspire to be superheroes or firefighters. Little girls are taught to be aspirational towards things like second homes to laze around in with their gal pals. Ok, so that sounds awesome, but it’s still sexist and disgusting.

When discussing my Playmobil love yesterday, I forgot that they sometimes traffic in race and class stereotypes that make me profoundly uncomfortable. [Insert German joke here. Maybe about the Playmobil bank in which a miserly Jew counts his money in the vault...) Anyway, as you can see, only white people live in the country.

When discussing my Playmobil love yesterday, I forgot that they sometimes traffic in race and class stereotypes that make me profoundly uncomfortable. [Maybe it’s a European matter-of-fact racism thing; after all, Playmobil is a German company.–Insert German joke here. Maybe about the Playmobil bank in which a miserly Jew counts his money in the vault…) Anyway, as you can see, only white people live in the country.

Black people in Playmobil land live in the city. [Not pictured: Playmobil cop who's about to stop and frisk this unsuspecting innocent out walking his Dalmations.]

Black people in Playmobil land live in the city. [Not pictured: Playmobil cop who’s about to stop and frisk this unsuspecting innocent out playing frisbee with his Dalmatians.]

Here is the dragon motif advent calendar, complete with kitchy Asian writing and Samurai types. Hmm...

Here is the dragon motif advent calendar, complete with kitschy Asian writing and Samurai types. Hmm…

I am literally speechless. But I am amused that the price has been reduced to see if they can unload this deeply troubling toy by making it cheaper. "Sure, it portrays a ridiculous amalgamated stereotype of an indigenous person, but it was such a bargain!"

I am literally speechless. But I am amused that the price has been reduced to see if they can unload this troubling toy by making it cheaper. “Sure, it portrays a ridiculous amalgamated stereotype of an indigenous person, but it was only $6.99!”

Hopefully this will help you simmer down after that tour through offensivetown. Little Liebchen attempting the smooth stretch move to put her arm around Das Big Boy.

Hopefully this will help you simmer down after that tour through offensivetown. Little Liebchen attempting the smooth stretch move to put her arm around Das Big Boy.

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2 Comments on “A Photo Essay of Toys That Offended Me Today at the Toy Store”

  1. Wow!! At least they have a windsurfer on the lego pic.

  2. […] So for LL’s birthday, I got her some female Lego people. It’s not easy. I know that under duress, they made those scientist ladies that are impossible to get/wickedly expensive. If you want to buy Lego Mini-Figures, it’s a surprise which one you’re getting and only 20% seem to be women, and some of those are women doing silly (slash awesome) things like dressing like unicorns, which is cool and all but maybe not that empowering. And if you buy a building set with a woman, it’s one of those Lego Friends sets, which we’ve already discussed. […]


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